Small Victories

It's very late, but I didn't want to go to sleep until I documented Lanie's small victory.  If you are close to our family, you are very, very well aware that Lanie has an, um, pee problem.  I talk about it a lot, sorry. She's well over 4-years-old and just can't seem to hold her bladder.  We were in Target last week and in the hour and 1/2 that we were there, we had to scurry up to the restrooms, FIVE times.  It's a problem.  And for the past 6 months, I can't remember a day when she didn't change undies 2, 3, 4 or more times.  Poor girl.  She's been pricked, tested, gone through ultra-sounds, seen a kidney specialist, all to find out that internally, she's fine.  It's just one of those things.  And when I look back over the past year with her and the anger I've had at her lack of control, or my impatience with her inconvenient wet pants, I am not proud of myself.  I've read the books and I've talked to the doctor who tells me to focus on the positive, to ignore the behavior, to recognize that this is her thing she has to figure out.  And all I can do is be patient and wait. 

And wait, and wait, and wait some more.  I have definitely begun to scold her less for ignoring the "gotta go now" signs and we've started to just assume it will happen.  How many times a day do I ask her, "wet or dry?"  Or how many times a day do I say, "Go potty, Lanie" only for her to respond with, "I don't have to"  only to watch her change clothes a few minutes later.  And how often do we get on the road to go somewhere only to have to pull off to a gas station or more often, a grassy roadside.  It's certainly not the most fun kid problem to have, but I know it could be worse. 

With that said, that's why this day was pretty special.  Lanie wore the same Princess underwear all day.  All day!  And she was so grown up.  Helpful and fun and easy-going.  So different from what we've coined, "the spirited child."  Granted, I still did a lot of reminding her, but the end result - a great day. 

I've had this Ariel doll up in my closet since I bought it cheap last Spring.  I've just been waiting for some reason to give it to her.  When I saw that there was a good chance she might accomplish it, I told her I had something special "if" she could make it to the end of the day.  Usually, those kind of bribes don't motivate her.  She forgets there's a prize at the end so she stops trying.  Today though, she was a different girl.  Maybe because it was just me and her spending time together, without distraction, I don't know, but I saw a little bit of the responsible girl I know she can be peeking through.  It was nice.  And I wasn't impatient or uptight or in a hurry.  A very good day.

So right before bed, as she's finally changing those princess undies, she says, "Ew, yucky underwear I've had on all day."  That made me laugh really hard especially as Lydia is explaining to her that most people only wear one pair a day.  In the end, she got her Ariel that she completely deserved and loved.

I have no idea what will happen tomorrow. It may go back to the multiple clothes changes we're so very used to and that's fine.  We'll get there. But, today was a great glimpse.